Boundary Talk : Part 1
by Sarah Gottesdiener·
Boundary Talk: Cord cutting and Raising Energy
I've wanted to talk about energetic and personal boundaries for ages now. Another touchy and easily misinterpreted B-word, boundaries are an imperative for any woman-identified human, most especially any sensitive person or energy worker or healer. There is so much to talk about that I am going to have to split up the subject into different blog posts. This blog post is going to focus on energetic boundary setting and cord cutting.
Boundaries have been a theme that have been coming up over and over again in my tarot readings. Usually I've found that the types of clients that I attract monthly or seasonally tend to have similar issues or questions that in some ways mirror my own. It is a great chance for me to delve into these topics for myself, and remind myself of how very useful they are.
Almost all my clients as of late have had Queen court cards in charged positions in spreads. This isn't strange—in general, court cards represent both an evolution standpoint of the querent, as well as represent a certain aspect of the suit they are residing in. They oftentimes are also referring to mentors or intimate relationships the seeker has (like a boss, girlfriend, best friend, sibling, or parent). The Queen is looking at the internal state. Depending on their placement, and the other cards in the spread, the Queen card can represent what the client may need to focus on, and the sort of energy they must invoke. For example, the Queen of Wands could suggest that girlfriend needs to have more fun, more confidence, be more in the moment, and get out there with her best self. She might need to focus on networking and do more physical activity to raise her energy levels. Perhaps the person also needs to think about her attitude: is she cheerful and encouraging to herself or others, or does she need to work on summoning some self-assurance and a sunnier perspective?
Most of the time, when I am reading for someone and Queens pop up it means they need to focus their energy on themselves. Her desires, her needs, her dreams, and her goals. What is one powerful way to do this? Boundaries, babe, boundaries!
Boundaries are one of the cornerstones of all the Queens' power. Depending on which suit you pull, the Queen can help address the zone of focus popping up for you in this moment.
Maybe your focus needs to be on your feelings, being gentle and compassionate with yourself and others, and the ability to give and receive emotionally: the Queen of Cups. If you pulled the Queen of Pentacles, perhaps it is time to focus on your inner reserves, resources, how grounded you are, what's going on in your career, home, and finances, as well as how you are defining abundance for yourself at this time. The Queen of Swords asks us to examine how our thoughts and communication are in alignment with our true nature. Are you underselling yourself, or being truly honest with how awesome you are? Are you communicating your talents and your desires clearly in your own life and with others?
Once you've examined what is really important to you right now, it is time to get real with your energy. What or whom is holding you back? How are you going to get rid of any stagnancy or bad vibes you are holding in your energy field? Any time is a great time to do so. Moon-wise and spell-wise, doing so during the waning Moon or dark Moon phases is potent—these phases support shedding, releasing, and letting go.
To check in with your energy, it is a good idea to get still, feel your body and your thoughts. Generally when we are thinking about something, someone, or when themes and topics pop up in your life with startling relevancy, this means there might be some energy getting leaked out in that direction.
Not trying to freak you out, dear reader, but all of us have "cords" or "tendrils" of energy going out of our body's chakras and overall field at all times. These correspond to people, places, or times. When we think about, talk about, or feel strongly about something, our energy body sends out cords to that which we are preoccupied about. Even if a relationship ended years ago, your energy might still be hooked into that person, or their energy might be hooked into you!
Usually it is easy to tell. Do you find yourself thinking about a person/place/situation months or even years after it has ended, particularly in a way that seems abnormally exorbitant? Can't "get over" something? If so, you probably are corded to that person/situation/place. Doesn't matter if it is someone you've known for 20 years, or the person who catcalled you as you ran down the street. Energy cords can take less than a minute to form.
An easy way to raise your power, and attend to yourself is by getting rid of energy cords that are no longer serving you, or that are downright toxic. If you have a ton of energy scattered all over the place, then your auric boundaries are leakier than the oldest New York City faucet. The easiest way to tighten up and ground yourself energetically is through cutting cords.
The easiest way to identify if you have an unhealthy cord attached is to notice your thought patterns, as stated above. Obsessing much? Thinking about a particular person, remembering things they said, etc.? Do you replay certain moments in your mind? Secondly, notice your feelings. When you think about a crappy old boss or a cheating ex-lover, do your feelings flood back as if it happened earlier today? Condragulations, you've most certainly got a cord attached and should remove it.
Find yourself in a comfortable seated position. Close your eyes and scan your body. If anything feels "off", you may have a cord there. Typical cord placements are your third chakra (your navel or stomach area), and your fourth chakra: the heart. Hone in and try to envision how wide or thick your cord is. "Follow" it back to where it is coming from. Any hits? Trust your intuition. Call in your guides, angels, or universal energy to cut or dislodge the cords. Feel the cords getting removed. Imagine the auric space getting filled with light and "sealed" up. Ask your guides, angels, or the universe to send healing light to the other person or situation. Tune in and think about any differences you may feel psychically or physically.
Another effective way to do this to state "I release all unhealthy cords and attachments. I call my energy back! My energy is my own and stays with me. " You might want to chant this for a moment while picturing all toxic energy leaving your body, and any energetic holes in your field replacing with glowing pink, green, white or silver light. It is a good idea to get into this practice once a day, more if you are an unhealthy work or school environment.
Want to know an easy way this has worked? The person in question contacts you in some way! They've felt you detaching and want to keep the familiar energetic exchange flowing. Don't respond. You can cut cords with someone as many times as you would like.
When you go out into the world, you can also call about energy to protect you. I like to imagine myself in a bubble of light that acts myself as a shield. Some psychics imagine a garden of roses around them, like a fence. The thorns don't let icky vibes inside, and the flowers send out loving light. It is a good idea to check in from time to time about where your energy is going. After I teach a big class, I have to be careful to remember call my energy back because it got so spread out focusing on so many different people's needs.
Queens focus on themselves first. Be conscious of your energy and where it goes. Be mindful of how you interact with others and be responsible for your energy. A mindful practice over months at a time will raise your energy and along with it, your power.